THIS ONE

Let's start with This One.  This One, I thought at the time, was The One.  This One did weird things for me.  He went to plays with me, he went out to eat with me, he talked to me endlessly on the phone, he told me his problems, he had me help him with his problems, he introduced me to his family, he met my family, and he was (at the time) The One.  It was the plays.  What man in his twenties volunteers himself to go to plays?  OK, rephrase, what straight man volunteers himself to go to plays?  This One did! This One knew that I had to go for class, and came with me!  WHAT?!?  I KNOW! I found a keeper! WOOHOO! 

This One had a sense of humor.  He made me laugh, and I made him laugh, which then made him jealous because I was funnier.  However, he liked that.  Huh?  I don't know either.  I showed him how to be more ambitious, and he showed me a bit more of my religion.  Then shit hit the fan.  I started being a bit more religious again because of This One.  He was subconsciously teaching me ideals of Islam, then he would go gamble.  Yes, a bit ironic.  However, I thought to myself, This One is bringing me into his world.  This One is going to make me a better person.  This One is showing me NO AFFECTION whatsoever because he respects me! WOW! This One is The One!  (Note: No affection means "No Affection".  No hugs, no pecks on the cheek, no handshakes, no nothing. NO AFFECTION)


This One then stopped calling.  This One did not give me a reason to why.  He just stopped.  I called a couple of times to try to figure out where I went wrong! ME! I CALLED THIS FOOL! (Yes, I yell quite a bit.  In person, I am a bit on the animated side, also)  This One gave no explanation.  Then one day, he called and I answered.  Yes I did.  (SIGH) I thought he was The One because he came back.  Fate had brought me back! 

Well after This One played this game of calling and not calling months at a time, it was time that our three year stint should have come to an end.  The relationship (or lack there of) was not the same.  I trusted him less.  I thought his religious take on life was a crock of shit, realizing that he loved Vegas and the boat a bit more than God himself. 

I almost forgot the best part, the cheating part.  Yes, I was the Other Woman.  The One was not This One.  This One has now realized that lies have short legs and you cannot get anywhere with a six foot torso with a three inch leg (no I'm not talking about a penis. Considering after he cheated and lied, it was probably an inch or so anyways).  Oh yes, the courting of Other Women. It's really not fun to be the Other Woman to This One's Women and be This One's Other Woman to Other Women.  It actually sucks.  I thank This One for making me realize that I cannot really trust many folks now because of it.  Not only I, the Other Woman, didn't know what he was up to.  Other Women and This One's Woman had no reason to think anything was going on! How could I know? He was like Houdini with a disappearing act that I kept accepting! 


Well, This One is now living happily whipped ever after with his life.  I'm sure that he enjoys every minute being wrapped around a finger of a woman who probably lied to him just like he lied to This One's Woman, Other Women, and the Other Woman (which is me if you haven't gotten it by now).  


This One, I thank you for not falling even harder in love with you.  I thank whatever spirit is out there that you didn't take my cherries.  Because if you did, it would probably dissolve in the cheap ass vodka that your ass is afraid to drink at the poker table because it is against the religion to drink. 


Three years vested in a no affection relationship.  If you're wondering where the losing the virginity part is in this story, it doesn't exist.  Just in case you couldn't pick that up from the NO AFFECTION.  


Lucky mat.