My First Move

It's a matter of figuring out what you want in a man.  Does he care about me? Does he love me for my flaws?  Does he love me for me?  It's the introduction, the first impression, the first glance you both have at one another, the what's the word?  The attraction.  Whether it's a personality trait or a physical appearance, it's what strikes that person to you.   Believe me, I'm no relationship expert.  In fact, everything I blog about is from my personal experience.  Just because I experienced a mini event, also known as Moment of Life, doesn't mean you necessarily have. 

I just watched this horrible movie.  It's called "Accidental Husband" and is about a women who is getting married and falls in love with another man.  Now, here's the twist, she is a love doctor who ruined his, what was to be marriage.  Blah blah blah, they fall in love, she doesn't get married to Guy 1, instead stays with the man whose life she ruined just two hours (a wasted two hours by the way) before.  Blah Blah Blah.  Happy ending. 

This does not happen.  It's that damned first impression that everyone dreads in which the other person judges if you are right or wrong.  Why do I hate these?  Because ever since I started this wretched ArabLounge, it has become first impression after first impression after first impression.  Now, I seem to do well with these First Impressions. I tend to get the guy interested and he's gung ho about me.  So, what next?  I don't know! I seem to have mastered the First Impression, that I forgot about the rest of the steps.  I tend to meet people, and I tend to not know what to do! Does he text me first?  Does he call me first?  Does he ask me out? 

Here's my jist, I don't mind taking the first steps.  I asked people out, I called first, I said hello first.  For some reason, the man seems to get intimidated.  Since when was it OK to wait for the guy to pull the first move?  I've been hounded many times by friends because I don't have that issue of taking the plunge first!  I am told numerous times that the man loves the chase and I am too strong and men don't like that.  Maybe I am a bit too independent for my own good.  What is there to lose?  Why do we have to live in this social normality of the man initiating everything?  I believe that instead of wondering what the guy thinks, don't wait, take the plunge, and find out.  If there's rejection, then he's just not that into you.  Why wait and wonder?  Relationships aren't a game, so why does everyone play it as if it is?

What I am trying to say is that I have nothing to lose.  If social norms say that I can't do something, I really don't care.  What's wrong with doing what you feel is right?  I say nothing. If it is not right, then I don't mind being wrong.  If I see something that I want, I don't want to lose it.  I say, let me go for it.  If there is nothing in the first place, then I have nothing to lose! And you know what, he might just agree to a cup of coffee that I asked him to accompany me with.

The mat is content with itself, even if it's overcast and blanketing my beautiful Chicago.  It still sits in Chicago, full from its coffee.