Mashallah!

You're child is sweet!  Mashallah!

You have a beautiful house! Mashallah!

You're pretty! Mashallah!

Mashallah is the heart and soul of the Arab.  You can be a Christian or a Muslim, and Mashallah better come out of your mouth.  If not, Unimportant Acquaintances are going to be offended.  OK, well what if I'm lying to your ugly kid by telling it that it's cute?  The I'm lying to God!  Mashallah means "Thank God" or "Luck/Graces given from God" or something of that sort.

For example:

ME: Wow! You're husband is really attractive! Mashallah!
PERSON MARRYING UGLY AND STUPID: Awww! thank you! Ukbal 3ndik!
ME: (in my head) Fuck you bitch, he's fugly and don't wish The Mistake on me ever again (/in my head)

So, what if I don't tell someone Mashallah? Is the magic carpet going to pass their house on Christmas and not give them better looks or something?  Boogy Boo! You're ugly, too!

I remember complimenting some Unimportant Acquaintance about her dress, becasue I actually liked the dress more than her...effing snob.  Anyways, I didn't say Mashallah.  After my compliment, her eyes bulged out and she scolded at me "SAY MASHALLAH!" So I did in fear that the new found cookie monster would mistaken me for an oreo and have me left as crumbs.  Now, if you have to ask for someone to tell you Mashallah, my take is this: They're lying to you.  They think your kid is ugly, your husband's an ass, you look fat in that skin tight dress, and your food tastes like Kibbles n Bits.  So don't force that out of me!

Now, many people tell you Mashallah when you're young and healthy and have enough in you to take it from anyone (meaning in the Arabic language...Boorrrr (rolling's r's) shit).  They tell you Mashallah for your hair, your clothes, your intelligence, your career, your humble abode, your marriage, and anything else that can be complimented.  Now, what happens when you're 70?  Ain't nobody saying, "Mashallah, you're ass needs to be wiped by the girl at the nursing home."  No one wants that predicament.  So, when you're pushing death, lived your life, no matter how awesome you were, no one wants to wish you wonderful graces from God.  Because, if they do, it's as if it all went to waste.  Why should I tell you Mashallah?  You're going to die in the next couple of days anyways?  If God doesn't take you away, it's going to be the live in nurse you have at your home.  He/she is really tired of wiping your stinky ass! 

Mashallah, my mat's clean today!